Hooray for feedback!

Question of the day:  Is negative feedback good?

Being an engineer, I can unequivocally say that, yes, negative feedback is good.  If you have a system with only positive feedback, it quickly spirals out of control and explodes, or at least lets all the magic smoke out of the circuits so that they no longer work.

With that in mind, I'd like to share some feedback I recently received.  More than once.

Craig, you talk too much.

Now, it's a good thing that someone, or I should say, multiple someones, provided this feedback to me, because I never would have considered it on my own. 

Writing is about using words to express ideas, so if you have complex ideas to express, doesn't that mean you'll need a lot of words?  Not necessarily.  Writing is just as much about selecting the proper word to fit the need, using an economy of expression.  Apparently, I should work on that.

My last post was meant to give an excerpt of a chapter I wrote as part of a short story coming out in Outward Bound next week.  I had hoped to break it up into ~1,000-word chunks and post it over the course of a month or so.  However, I found that there wasn't a clear place to break until almost 2,500 word into the chapter.

So I wrote a few notes to introduce the story, and then plunked the whole opening into the blog post.  The feedback I got was that the post was too long, and no one would likely spend the time to get to the end.

Oddly, I received the same feedback from my partners in crime.  For our fifth book, we had decided to publish a number of short stories to expand on what was told about certain characters central to our other four books.  Five stories were assigned, and each one was to have been 10 to 15 thousand words. 

When I turned mine in, it was nearly 30,000 words, and the feedback was that I needed to work on the "short" part of short story writing (see last post).

Feedback acknowledged, and I will definitely work on that.

-Craig

The Competition Excerpt

Hi, everyone! I haven't posted in a while, for which I apologize. Most of my free time lately has been spent working on finishing up Outward Bound.  That's not a bad thing, right?  The way to be a writer is to write, after all.

Anyway, since my time lately has been put into the new book coming out on 5 September, I thought I would share the piece of "The Competition" I worked on, served up in bite-sized chunks!

But first, a few words about what this book is, and how it's different than the four previous books my brothers and I have produced.  Dead Reckoning, Day of Reckoning, Force of Reckoning, and Final Reckoning together form a four-act play, but like every story ever, it starts in medias res, which leaves backstory to fill in as you go.  In some cases, there's just too much that happened to just "fill it in."  For example, early in Dead Reckoning, Admiral Cosina comments to Captain Brighton that he had forgotten that Brighton knew Major Chowdhury already, having become acquainted during "that Humboldt mess."  Well, that stray comment led to us imagining and talking about what had actually happened, especially how that event led to Chowdhury's current outlook and personality, to the point that we had a whole novel's worth of story to tell.  Jeff started writing it out as The Humboldt Mess, but then changed the title to Forged by Betrayal, which should be finished up and published by the end of the year.

There's another scene early in Dead Reckoning where Admiral Cosina asks the commandant of the Naval Academy to find a way to identify the top five graduates for him to assign to a project, and she can't tell any of them exactly what they're needed for.  The five new ensigns become central characters to the story, but there's still that origin story that was just too big to put in a flashback scene.  So that's where "The Competition," comes from.  It tells the story of the senior year at the academy, and the year-long competition to find out who the best really are.

In addition to that story, Outward Bound has four more "short"* stories.  "Born Explorer" is a little of Captain Brighton's experience at the academy; "I'll Rise" is a combat story about Major Chowdhury; "Lost and Alone" features Hayes and Mitchell, whose interactions are always fun to write; and "Whatever the Family Needs" reveals all the details of the secret Ensign Samuels goes to such great lengths to keep.

I hope you all enjoy the stories, and to whet your appetite, here's the first 2,500 or so words of Chapter 6 of  "The Competition!"

-Craig

* Jeff says I just don't get the "short" part of short story writing.  He may have a point, since my contribution to this compilation weighs in at nearly 30k words.  It's just that, well, that's how much it took to tell the whole story.

Maybe I just talk too much...

Chapter 6

Warner Naval Academy, Quito Complex

Saturday, 15 November 2786

In years past, the week after course finals were completed had always been a time to decompress; perhaps visiting home, or just getting away with friends.  That wasn't going to happen this year.

As far as Monica Samuels could figure, the Academy brass wanted to keep the pressure as high as possible, probably expecting this to be another differentiator in determining whom the best actually was.  To that end, they had announced two "voluntary" competitions, one in unarmed hand-to-hand, full-contact combat, and the other in Kendo stick, which would contribute points towards the cadets' ongoing competition.  Since participation in the concurrent tournaments was not required, they were living up to their obligation to allow downtime, while still knowing that anyone that was serious about winning could not allow herself to skip any possible source of points.  Most of the cadets knew they weren’t going to make the cut down to the top fifty, and were likely leaving campus later this morning, but since the final grades had not yet updated the leaderboard, there were probably over a hundred still holding out hope, Samuels thought.

That was why, at 0615, fourteen hours after her Astrogation final was submitted, Samuels was jogging through the early morning fog across campus toward Harrington Field House, instead of climbing onto a maglev to join her adoptive family at their home.  She couldn't afford not to, not if she was serious about winning, and she couldn't remember being more serious about anything since making the decision to come to the Academy.

The day’s events were not something Samuels was expecting to win.  While she was clearly at the forefront of her class in all the academic areas, for many of the physical aspects of the competition, she found herself buried in the fat part of the bell curve.  Still, her willowy build had been an asset in the fun run, and she did have ambitions to excel in the Kendo tournament.  She didn't have the strength to grapple effectively, so hand-to-hand had always been difficult for her, but the speed and grace her slender frame could produce were well-suited to the two-stick martial art.

The tournaments were not set to begin until 0800, but Samuels wanted plenty of time to register and strategize once she had her match schedule.  The field house was enormous, entailing multiple buildings, and she might have to sprint from one event to the next, depending on how the timing was arranged.

Her idea was clearly not original, as she came through the main doors and straight into a queue at least forty cadets long leading up to the registration table.  Nor had she been accurate in her estimate of the number of cadets still holding out hope.  There were easily another hundred behind her before she made it up to the front of the line.

“Entering both tournaments?” the bored woman with Chief Petty Officer’s stripes asked. 

“Yes, Chief.”

“Step on the scale.”  Samuels complied.  “Cadet M. Samuels, 48.8,” she called to the other end of the table to a Marine corporal, who dutifully entered the information, causing Samuels’ name to appear on the tournament board behind the table.  Hers was the only name appearing in the “Strawweight” list on both boards.

Samuels accepted the sheet she was handed and listened to the monotone recitation of her instructions.  “First round is a round robin by weight class.  Top two advance to a double elimination round with the neighboring class; for you that’s flyweight.  Ten points for first place, 7.5 for second, 5 for third, 2.5 for fourth.  No points for an exit in the first round.  The order of events is first round hand-to-hand, first round Kendo, remaining rounds hand-to-hand, and remaining rounds Kendo. Any questions?”

“No, Chief.”

“Next!”

Samuels collected her duffel bag from the floor where she had set it to weigh in and hurried around the table.  Taking a last glance at the board, she saw that ‘0800’ was now displayed next to her name, as it was for the top pair in the other thirteen classes, the times generally increasing as her eyes swept lower.

There were few names from her personal watch list who had registered already, but one stood out immediately.  Kinsey Pinson was listed in the Flyweight Class, which meant she might have a chance to face off against her, and perhaps move past her in the standings.  Always assuming she could actually make it out of the first round, and then do better than Pinson.

Samuels double-timed it down the corridor, entering the net address she found on her sheet into her datapad as she went.  The main board she had seen before was there, but also match locations for herself, and what would eventually be round robin standings for her weight class.  She followed the helpful directions on her pad, first for “hand-to-hand events” (Building A), and then to her assigned match location (Green 1) on the main floor.

She had arrived wearing her exercise uniform, so there was no need for her to change.  That wouldn't be the case for her next round, and she would have to allow several minutes to don the protective kendogu.

After twenty minutes of stretching and warming up, Samuels felt ready to go, but she still had 35 minutes before her first match.  She headed over to the spectator seating and pulled out her pad.  Time for more strategizing, now that more information should be available.  Another name, Brekka Gustafson, had been added to the strawweight list, and there was a banner declaring that registration would close in 19 minutes, 15 minutes before the first event.

Preparing a strategy to beat Gustafson was proving difficult, since Samuels had not interacted with her much.  Firstly, Gustafson had been in a few of the same courses, but had always been reserved, never asking questions.  The young woman wasn't in the same barracks as her, nor even in the same battalion, so the two simply traveled in different circles.  The one clear memory Samuels had of her was during Basic Cadet Training, when her blonde hair and pale complexion, combined with her unaccustomedness to the high altitude, had led to a bad sunburn and heat exhaustion.  They had all been out on maneuvers in the Ilinizas Range, west of campus, and an air lorry had to be called in to carry her out.

The best strategy Samuels could think of at the moment was to watch the other girl warm up and see if there was any flaw on display that she might take advantage of.  It was pretty thin, but all she could come up with.

That part of her planning out of the way, she went back to her pad to see what new data it contained.  The answer was, not much.  She could see on the main board everyone who had registered so far, which was a much larger number than Samuels had expected, but there were no match locations available to her for anyone outside her weight class.  Samuels had been hoping to observe some of the matches for the flyweights, in case she wound up having to face them in the next rounds.

Gustafson had come in while Samuels was trying to glean a little more information.  Her uniform was as damp as Samuels' was, so clearly, she had warmed up somewhere else.  So much for her brilliant planning. Shockingly, Gustafson walked straight across the mat and sat down next to her soon-to-be opponent.

"Samuels."

"Gustafson.  How were finals?"

"No surprises.  Except Gravimetrics.  Nine tenths of the final exam was material we'd only covered in the last two weeks."

"Who did you take it from?"

"Captain Andretti."

"Hm.  I'm in Admiral Yu's section.  Guess I can thank my lucky stars."

“While you’re at it, you can thank them that for once, your size is going to be to your advantage.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, the way the two tournaments are set up, you and I are guaranteed at least five Competition points each, just for competing.  There are only three strawweights in our class, and Chantel’s family absolutely would not accept any excuses for her staying here during break.   That leaves only you and me, so both of us are getting out of the first round, and by my math, that’s at least 2.5 points per tournament.  Plus, I’m about to propose a strategy to increase our chances.”

“Whoa.  Hold on a second.”  Samuels pulled up the main board on her pad and looked it over.  She couldn’t see any changes from her last view, which meant that everyone who was going to register had probably already done so.  As Gustafson had said, there were still only two signed up in her weight class.  The next smallest class was super heavyweight with 14.  Twenty-five were registered as flyweight.

“There are a lot more registered than I thought would be here,” Samuels commented.  “Surely all these cadets can’t think they have a chance to be in the top fifty and make the cut.”

Gustafson waved an arm aimlessly.  “Of course not.  I know I’m probably not in the running anymore, but that’s not the point.”

“Okay, then what is the point?”

“The point is, that when all of these cadets graduate, and go out applying for postings, for the first time ever there is going to be an objective ranking from top to bottom of exactly how good you are.  For those of us not in the top fifty, after this week our ranking is set.  Period.  Don’t you think everyone wants the chance to add just a few more points to their final score?”

“Huh.  I hadn’t thought of it that way, but it makes sense.”

“Well, I may not be top fifty, but I do have a functional brain.”

“That, my new friend, is quite evident.  So, what is this strategy your functional brain has come up with to increase our odds?”

“There are two aspects, so I’ll start with the one you’re most likely to accept.  There are twenty-five possible opponents we could be facing in the next round, of which I have only sparred with the two from my company.  The best approach would be to study them while they’re working through the first round, but there are too many matches going on at the same time.  However, with two people working together, and sharing notes, it would be possible.”

“Deal.”

“Okay, now for the somewhat less ethical proposal.”

Samuels drew back slightly.

“Oh, it’s not all that bad."  Gustafson waved her hand negligently.  "I said less ethical, not unethical.”

Samuels waved a hand.

“This should be good, let’s hear it.”

"We've already got an advantage over the flyweights for the next round, because our first round will consist of one match, while they'll have 24.  So, they're going to be more worn out and beat up, no matter what."

"Makes sense."

"And since the final rounds are double-elimination with four competitors, the seeding makes almost no difference. You have to beat either two or three of the three competitors in order to win."

"I can see that," Samuels said, though she hadn't thought about it that way before it was pointed out.

"And given your greater reach and speed, you're likely to beat me in Kendo.  But given my greater strength and better leverage, I'm more likely to beat you at hand-to-hand.  I say we just accept that as the likely outcome, and give only a token match to each other.  So, what do you think?"

"I think that if I ever get a command of my own, I want you running my Tactical Department."

Samuels had to concede that the other cadet's assessment was likely true.  Gustafson was much shorter, and had the musculature of a gymnast.  She also had considerably more curves, not that Samuels was jealous.  And her calling it 'less ethical' was probably also the right read, since it wouldn't actually violate any rules.  So, what harm could it do to play it safe?

Samuels could tell immediately that even asking herself the question was meant to justify it to herself, because it didn't feel right to her.  Another thought occurred to her at almost the same time, and that one she shared.

"The commandant said that her staff would be watching more than just the points during the competition.  I don't think it's worth the risk of incurring their displeasure, especially when we've already got a big advantage in hand."

"Fair enough.  I'll try not to hurt you."

"Right.  Just remember that whatever happens in hand-to-hand, I'll have a chance to even the score in Kendo."

Gustafson smiled.  "Right."  She extended her hand and Samuels took it and shook on their deal.  The referees had arrived while they talked, and it was time to begin the day's events.

Gustafson turned out to be so much better than Samuels that Samuels was wishing she'd taken the deal after all.  The first fall went less than 30 seconds, and she barely lasted a full minute for the second.  By the third, Samuels was learning a little more about how Gustafson liked to attack.  Samuels saw the same grip from the first fall coming and maneuvered out of it before it was established.  The two combatants re-established positions, and Gustafson was a little more hesitant to initiate contact now.  Samuels tried a feint and then a leg sweep that Gustafson anticipated and dodged.  Her countermove came at Samuels almost faster than she could react, but she moved just in time and caught the extended arm and pulled, twisting on the way down so that Gustafson hit the mat underneath Samuels.  A quick strike to the sternum without any power behind it earned Samuels her first point of the match.  It turned out to be her last also, as Gustafson scored the three remaining points needed to win in a matter of a few minutes.

Walking back to the spectator seats, where they had left their gear, Gustafson commented, "I told you that would be the likely outcome."

"You did, indeed, tell me so.  And honestly, I thought you were probably right.  I just couldn't not try, you know?"

"I completely understand.  Shall we divide up who's evaluating which flyweights?  I don't much care about most of them, but I would like to take detailed notes on Pinson.  If our paths do cross, I want to know every possible way to render her unconscious."

"You, my new friend, have just risen even higher in my esteem.  Perhaps we can arrange things so that both of us will have that opportunity."

Why Sci-fi Readers should attend Comic Book Conventions

Picture this:

People dressed as their favorite characters from their favorite book, Wizards, Comic book Heroes, cartoon heroes or even the off-beat goofball.

These are the sights that can be seen in abundance at nearly every ComicCon, FanX, WonderCon or convention, whatever the current naming sequence. It is a wondrous celebration that transforms everyone into a new person; sends them to a new world and creates a new experience.

This is the enjoyment that we get when we attend these events.

Why I went to Comic Conventions

I have to say, when I started going to these conventions, I had the singular purpose of selling the Science Fiction books that my brothers and I had written.  

I have been a Sci-fi geek since I was eight years old and my mother read Heinlein’s Rocketship Galileo to me and my brother, and I was deeply engaged into comic books before Marvel ever hit the big screen, but I have never had the urge to attend a ComicCon. This thought process changed after my first visit, even though, as I mentioned, I went just to sell books. As I also mentioned, the experience is something that you have to, well… experience, to understand.

I have to admit, that there are those who will probably never understand, and there is nothing wrong with that. The world is made up of different people and that is the way it should be. For those of us who identify with the young Luke Skywalker as he looks off into the desert and wants adventure in his life, the ComicCons and other conventions, will always stir our thoughts and our adventurous natures.

Why Sci-Fi readers should be at Comic Book Conventions

So, why do Sci-fi readers need to attend these conventions? First, I you need to understand that every Con is different. They all have their own vibe and theme. I have to say that the first time I went to the Salt Lake ComicCon (now renamed FanX) it had a strong writer feel to it, probably because many of the guests and panelists were writers or publishers.

The Portland, OR ‘RoseCity Con’ however had a much stronger Comic Book feel to it, probably because many of the guests were comic publishers and there were fewer authors there. Having said that, however, all Cons have a great chance for authors to interact with their readers directly. This year, at FanX, I went to a panel that had Brandon Sanderson, Mercedes Lackey, David Farland, all several other authors, all on the same panel, talking to whoever wanted to sit in a room and listen to them. It was awesome!

Author Panels are Great for Readers as well as Authors.

I also had the chance to sit in another panel. Now I have to admit, I probably wouldn’t have gone to this one without a special reason. The topic was something like- How Do You Convert your Ideas into Novels. I have found that, over the years, this has become easier for me. Like any talent or muscle, the more you exercise it, the easier it seems to be to use it. As I prepare to publish my fifth novel, this process is easier for me than it once was.  Like I said, I probably wouldn’t have gone to this panel except that a young lady was speaking there that I have known since she was seven years old and my daughter’s best friend. Tricia Levenseller has published two exceptional YA books and her third was released this last February. I was excited to see that she had been invited to be on the panel and I wanted to go see her.  It was a great panel, and I have to say I learned some things that I could use, too.  But I have to say that the best thing about both panels was the fact that authors were willing to sit and answer questions and let readers into the process of how a story goes together.

As an Author, I’d Love to See You at my Next Con

Whatever your previous feelings about Comic Conventions, I hope that I will see you at my next Con. It is the place where all readers belong. A land of adventures.

What do you think?

How to Start a Book

Okay, I finished the rough draft of my manuscript… and then the second draft… and then I went through it again. You know what? I hated the beginning.

Maybe I had read this thing too many times. Maybe the whole thing was trash. I started doing some research. I had one question to answer… How is a book supposed to start?

I realized that I’m not the first author to ask this question when I realized how many books and blogs there are out there with this as a topic line. Realizing that I could kill many hours reading and call it research, I dug in to read as many of these as possible. I was going to find out the perfect solution to my dragging book problem.

After several hours, I realized that each author had their own solution to the best way to start a book. Although I had become familiar with some great phrases like, ‘setting the hook’ and ‘dragging the reader in’, I still didn’t know for sure how to redo the beginning of my book. I had found several books that made me question where the beginning of my book should be, however. Maybe I needed to add a few more chapters at the beginning? Tell more story? Tell less story?

Finally, I decided that the opening of the book just needs a couple of things. When I go shopping for a new book I often read the first page. If I like the character and the voice of the author, I’ll probably buy the book. So, I decided that what I really needed to do was to go back to the beginning of my book and rewrite the first page and make sure that the character is in there enough to be understood and that I get enough of my writing style there for the reader to understand how I’ll write the story. I just needed to create some situation for the main character to ‘be in’ that would describe her personality in the first page. How hard could that be, right?

One of the most interesting blogs, that I read, used the Disney movies as an example. In most of the Disney animated movies, the main character is introduced by an opening song that goes through and introduces their world and the one thing that they value. Belle in the opening of Beauty and the Beast and her books, as an example. 

Now, all I have to do is find that core value of my character and create an interesting scene to begin the book. It doesn’t even have to have an importance in the story, just introduce the character and grab the reader into the story.

Should be easy, right?